I often hear people say that they need to “just stop caring what others think!” I think a lot of times what they mean is that they would like others’ opinions and perceptions of them to matter less in their decision-making. And I get that – I too often wonder what others’ think of me …
Counseling
Anxiety as a Smoke Detector
We live in an older home, and my husband and I often lament its poor ventilation system. Smells from the kitchen will emanate in one of the bedrooms and the air quality reading on our air purifier quickly descends into less desirable readings when we make a simple pot of popcorn on the stove. It …
What is a “window of tolerance”?
Recently, I’ve been talking with more of my clients about the idea of a window of tolerance. What is a window of tolerance you ask? When we’re in our window of tolerance, it does not mean we’re not experiencing stress, anxiety, fear or any difficult emotion. It means that we are able to tolerate those …
Fear of Drowning in Pain
Some of the most common emotions that come up in my work with Christian women are anxiety, anger, grief, and guilt. Obviously, these are not fun emotions for anyone to experience, which is what lands them in my office. They want new ways to cope with difficult feelings so that they can live vibrant and …
Practicing Gratitude When You Don’t Feel Grateful
Halloween is over. Time to put away the pumpkins and put up the Christmas trees! For many of us, the holiday season brings joy and memories of childhood delight, time with loved ones, and special holiday traditions. There are times in our lives, however, where these seasons seem cloaked with pain and sadness. We may …
On “Dying to Self”
Matthew 16:24: “Then Jesus said to his disciples, ‘Whoever wants to be my disciple must deny themselves and take up their cross and follow me.’” Luke 9:23: “Then he said to them all: ‘Whoever wants to be my disciple must deny themselves and take up their cross daily and follow me.’” Galatians 2:20: “I have …
“Demoting” Anxiety
I really love the idea depicted here of giving anxiety a “performance review.” (To check out the illustrator’s Instagram page, click here). I think this would be a worthwhile exercise to consider anxiety’s performance in my everyday life! We often conflate the emotions of anxiety and fear, as if they are synonymous. They are similar, …
Life is Hard.
No buts about it. I was getting ready for work not long ago when I started feeling very anxious about my daughter at summer camp. She’s gone to this summer camp before and loves it! I trust the camp director, and she knows our family well. Yet, a small miscommunication about something at drop off …
Spiritualizing Feelings
I recently saw a meme on Instagram that resonated with me. There’s been a lot of talk about “deconstructing” in Christian faith circles, with several strong opinions both for and against. I appreciated this creator’s perspective (Sam Won, @SamObiWon), when he posted: “I’m a decluttering Christian. Grateful for the faith I was raised in for …
“Worrying is Optional” by Ben Eckstein, LCSW
Today, I’m reviewing the book, “Worrying is Optional” by Ben Eckstein, LCSW, who is a leading voice in the field of anxiety and OCD treatment. I’ve read a lot about anxiety and worry throughout my career, and when I picked this book up, I figured it would be more of the same of what I’ve …